Scream!

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mom-and-kidsI love my children so much! They’re God’s greatest gifts! However, at times (or many times), I can’t help but shout at them really loud that my entire neighborhood can also hear my scream loud and clear.

My daughter is 8 and my son is 5. They always play but during their play time, they always end up fighting. And I hate it when one of them starts to cry or hit each other. I am working online and I cannot concentrate when there’s so much noise within my working area. I don’t shout at them right away when I hear them crying or screaming, I talk to them first in my normal voice tone and ask them what’s happening or what’s going on, but they’re ignoring me as if no one’s talking. So, after a few minutes of still hearing them fighting, I ask them once more, but still, no one’s answering me. I let it pass since I’m also busy with my job. BUT once I can hear them again fighting and shouting, that’s the time I scream back to them at the top of my lungs. Sometimes I am patient to them when I am not busy doing something, but since most of the time I am busy, I am always impatient. Am I being unfair to my kids for being impatient? Should I just ignore them when they’re fighting – after all, all siblings fight when they’re playing so let them handle their own battle.

That’s not the only time I yell to them. I yell when I ask them to do something and they’re not obeying me after 3-4x of asking. I yell to them when we are in a hurry but they’re moving like they’re taking all the time in the world. I yell to them when I ask them to eat but they’re just playing while eating.

I know I am not the only mother who yells to their kids but believe me or not, I feel pain after shouting at them – they’re my precious ones but why am I hurting them with my loud voice? I do not say bad words when I scream but I can see on their adorable faces that they got scared. After I scream, in about 2 minutes, my son will come to me and say he’s sorry for what he did. And that would always melt my heart. I will then kiss him and hug him tight and say my sorry and explain to him why I screamed that way. My daughter on the other hand is very stiff – she would never start saying sorry for everything. BUT when I call her and I ask for forgiveness, that’s the time she would say “sorry too, mama” and everything will be back to normal —- in 4 to 5 hours and back to fighting and screaming again.

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